Red Balls and Rock N’ Roll

Who doesn’t think “porn industry” when someone mentions the San Fernando Valley? I mean, maybe other images ping pong back and forth, like lots of pine trees, gangbangers, or just a portrait of general suburban drudgery…but after an orgasmic experience of the edible kind, I will now think “perfect pizza and porn” when I hear it. Because not only is the Valley home to that lucrative backyard business, but residents also have access to an entire 20 inches…of delicious pizza crust, that is! And at Red Balls Rock N’ Roll Pizza, the coolest New York-style pizza joint on the west coast, you get yourself helpful servings of amazing Italian food, wide screen Hi-Def vintage concerts by The Stones, The Stooges, and Black Sabbath, and even live punk rock. All for a fraction of those NY prices.

Flanked by a rocker/bondage-gear shop on its left side, and slathered from toilet to ceiling in rock/punk/metal posters of all kinds, Red Balls is both decadent in style and smart-alecky in demeanor. And you should skip the reservations for wherever you’ve made tonight or this weekend and just go there. Surrounded by memorabilia, including the guitars of Eddie Van Halen, band pictures signed by Queen, The Clash, and others, you might notice that the ceiling lights are even placed in snare drums. This place puts as much passion into their pizza as their love for rock.

My friend and I split huge slices of pizza, covered in pretty much every topping known to man, along with a salad and a huge bowl of Bolognese-drenched pasta. The only qualm is that there’s no beer!, but the folks at Red Balls are gracious enough to let you bring your own. So stop by the gas station or liquor store on your way, and grab a slice! Not to be missed, and well worth the drive for local Los Angelenos!